Maria Hose Cristerna, a mum of four from Mexico, showed off her unusual looks at a tattoo exhibition in Monterrey in California recently.

She had her body transformed as a reaction to enduring years of abuse at home.

The striking look is completed by specially shaped vampire 'fang' teeth, fake eye colours and massive earrings – but she's not finished yet! The 35-year-old claims that she wants even more horns implanted.

'Tattoos were a form of liberation for me – my way of being immortal - and the horns I have are a symbol of strength and were implanted without anaesthetic,' she told The Sun.

'I had the fangs done because I loved vampires as a little girl and I changed the colour of my eyes so they were how I really wanted them to be.'

I think if I saw this lady in real life, I'd shat my pants. It must suck going through metal detectors for her, and is titanium magnetic? I wonder what would happen if someone placed one of those huge magnets they use in the junk yards on top of her...Would her horns rip out of her skin?!
 

Hahahahahahaha. The green card joke is the best!

California Assembly and Senate recently approved assembly bill 1176 to help San Francisco with financing issues or some politics crap like that. Anyway, Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger thought the bill was “unnecessary” and decided to veto it by sending along this wonderful letter complete with profane subliminal messages:

^ Proof Schwarzenegger is the man. And yes, the letter is real but his office keeps insisting that it was just a strange coincidence.

This is funny. In these three situations, Arnold is supposed to be observing the aftermath of a fire, but instead he finds and picks up dumbells. LOL.

This California native woman, believes that she can fix all of Californias problems. With ideas like "We can make the machines make our cars", "We can put fruits in the refrigerator, and it'll last forever and the foods free we should sell it", and this last part wasn't an idea but a factual quote "On the east coast, they have slaves and made in China but in the west coast... the new west coast we don't believe in that because we're the Union.