First the kitchen... and then... THE WORLD!

So for those of you who follow my blog, I bought a bike recently for campus use and I freaking flew off, which resulted in me scratching myself up pretty bad. This guy? Well not only does he not give a crap about wearing a helmet in a busy street, but he only needs his back wheel. I was told by my friend to always lock the back wheel because someone can still take most of the parts if you just lock your front wheel...Well I'm guessing this guy jacked someone's bike and went away with most of the bike!

I know I tweet and talk about poop a lot but HOLY MOTHER OF PANZY PANTS THIS DUDE HAS LITERALLY BEEN STUCK IN CRAP FOR 2 DAYS. This happened in China somewhere and I was gagging all throughout reading the article.

The man said he slipped while using the outhouse toilet hole two days ago, and slipped into the pit below.

Nobody had used the toilet in the mean time so he was not discovered - even though his family had reported him missing.

TWO DAYS! WHAT THE CRAP!

I hope he stars in The Avengers movie.

I used to play Counter-Strike a lot and I still do time to time. My brother is going through that CS phase of his life. A lot of us went through that phase. And a lot of us have cursed at hackers for using cheats in the game. Well, check out this story.

A Chinese kid (Xiao Wei, age 16) in Mishazi, Jilin, China who works at an internet cafe used "wallhacks" (being able to see through walls in the game) while playing Counter-Strike. A gang of Chinese kids accused him of hacking, stab his friend in the arm and stab him in the head. Luckily, they both survive. There were points in life when I wanted to stab hackers, but NOT in real life! Only in the game! Sometimes kids just lose it and forget its just a game!

It was a super long title to the post, but that is exactly how I felt hahaha. How can you put Jackie Chan in a trailer with a black person and not find it funny?! This guy did three movies with Chris Tucker... Chris Tucker! Either way, I feel like it's still going to be a pretty neat movie, even though we all know what's going to happen. If you don't, I'll lay down the movie for you, and if it doesn't go according to this than I'm shocked. (Btw I am assuming all this from the trailers)

• Kid has to move to China for some crazy reason
• He doesn't fit in because he's a black kid in...China
• Chinese people (from China), being the racists they are tell him he doesn't fit in and to go back to (Name country that is predominately black here)
• Being Chinese, they do kung-fu and wupp his butt.
• Jackie Chan (being Jackie Chan) comes and saves the day.
• Jackie Chan makes him do ridiculous things that seem to have nothing to do with kung fu.
• The kid then learns kung fu and owns the Asian kids and maybe...JUST MAYBE, the Asian kids end up respecting him at the end and it becomes a tear jerker because no one would expect them to do that.

BAM, all from the trailer. I'm still going to watch it anyway. Oh yeah, he probably also ends up liking an Asian girl, making it some interracial kiddy relationship making it all cutesy.

I have no idea what this French guy is talking about, but that Chinese man is my new role model. This method of fishing is called cormorant fishing, using the birds (cormorants) to do the fishing for you. GANGSTER! I WANNA LEARN! Thanks Emre!

I wonder if we could train the Sheepshead Bay seagulls to do that.